Go Ahead... Make My Day

Words have an amazing ability to tear down or to build up. And we each have the choice as to which option to use.

I've always been somewhat insecure, but in a way that seems unusual to me. I like who I am. I am mostly happy with my looks, and I feel like there are a lot of things that I can do very well. However I've always felt that other people don't see me the way I see myself.

I love music, particularly singing. However, tenor is not seen as the appropriate vocal range for a female to sing, so I've generally been pushed to sing alto which I just can't do well. Because of that, I quit choir in college after only one year. No one seemed to mind too much. I was never the one in my family who was noted for her musical ability. I didn't get the solos or ensembles in choir because the guys always got the tenor parts. So I found myself wondering if I really had any singing ability.

A few weeks ago I was sitting next to someone I had never met before during my coworker's funeral service. My coworker had loved music, so singing was a large part of this service. And after the service, the man next to me turned and commented, "If I ever find myself needing a good tenor, I might have to call you."

Wow. Is that affirmation or what? This man was someone who had started a very well-known choral music group in our area and he thought I was good enough. Maybe I'll join choir again after all.

It's easy to be insecure about our looks. Even though I like how I look, I was always the unnoticed one. It's funny how those old teenage fears and insecurities stick with us our entire lives! But lately I've been getting more affirmation, and not just when I post erotic pics.

Sunday afternoon I took my daughter shopping for some clothes (she hates wearing her brothers' hand-me-downs!) While I watched her happily browsing the cool jeans, an older man who was waiting for his wife & granddaughter asked me, "Has anyone told you that you're very good-looking?"

How do you answer something like that without sounding like you're stuck up??? I'm really not, and I hate sounding like I am! So I smiled widely and replied something like, "A few times, but it's always great to hear it again."

And just yesterday a friend commented to me, "Good gawd, you're a good looking woman."

Keep it up... I may be able to get rid of those insecurities yet!

How many of us have had those tech support calls from hell? You know the kind... where the person "helping" you knows less than you know, and simply reads from a list to tell you what to do without even listening to you?

The last time I called Dell, I spoke to Jim. I had a very enjoyable hour of conversation and work on my computer. Yes, really. Jim knew what he was doing. When I stumped him, he checked with other people, and he admitted it. He looked where I told him to look so he would know what I was referring to. He made reasonable suggestions rather than telling me to re-do the same things that had been done many times.

At one point he sent me an email. At the end of the call, I asked him for his full name and where the email would go if I replied to it. In a nervous tone he answered that it would go to his boss. Then I told him, "Good. I want to email to let them know what a good job you did." He was thrilled at the compliment, and gave me his full name and his rep ID number to refer to. I think I made his day!

About month ago we went to The Outback Steakhouse for my birthday. (Yes, this was part of the "strip club" outing I told of earlier in the month.) We had an awesome server. She even brought me warm, clean plates to lay on my lap when I asked, because the restaurant was so cold. At some point during our meal, the manager went round to various tables asking if we needed anything. We said we were waiting for bread but that we had told our server. When she heard who our server was, she commented, "Then I won't even remind her because I know she's already getting it."

I responded, "Yes, she has been doing an incredible job. I'm sure she is too." Apparently The Outback has a pin program. Each time a server receives a compliment from a guest, they get a pin. So the manager gave me a pin and told me to give it to the server. I was told the server would know what it meant. I got a squeal and a hug when I gave it to her. She knew it meant that I had told someone she was doing a good job.

Am I rambling? Yeah, I guess I am. But I do have a point with all of these stories. The old adage "Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me" is obviously a lie. But words can also make your day. Or someone else's. The best part is that knowing you made someone else's day can also make yours.

Today I'm encouraging all of you, in some small way, to make someone's day. And be sure to tell me about it.