Yesterday I signed the petition for dissolution. It will be filed sometime this week. And while I truly believe this is a positive step for me, I spent the day stressing. I felt like someone was sitting on my chest. I was on the verge of tears most of the day. I was needy and tired and had a massive headache.
And then I went home and had to do the FAFSA filing for my oldest son. And that was just one too many stresses, so I had a nice glass of vodka with cranberry-pomegranate juice & a splash of lime. Or two. Maybe three. (Glasses, not splashes).
I was very happy. And the FAFSA became much more tolerable. Even though it is just done in estimated format, at least it's done.
And when I was finished, I celebrated by browsing Facebook, and found a high school friend online. She's coming to visit this weekend, so we chatted to make the plans... and kept on chatting. For hours. Until 3 am or so, to be somewhat precise.
We found out all sorts of things we have in common, and debunked numerous misconceptions about each other. And today I'm tired, but I feel really good. I don't really feel all that tired.
It's amazing what a supportive friend does for that pain in the chest.
And then I went home and had to do the FAFSA filing for my oldest son. And that was just one too many stresses, so I had a nice glass of vodka with cranberry-pomegranate juice & a splash of lime. Or two. Maybe three. (Glasses, not splashes).
I was very happy. And the FAFSA became much more tolerable. Even though it is just done in estimated format, at least it's done.
And when I was finished, I celebrated by browsing Facebook, and found a high school friend online. She's coming to visit this weekend, so we chatted to make the plans... and kept on chatting. For hours. Until 3 am or so, to be somewhat precise.
We found out all sorts of things we have in common, and debunked numerous misconceptions about each other. And today I'm tired, but I feel really good. I don't really feel all that tired.
It's amazing what a supportive friend does for that pain in the chest.
3 comments:
The hardest part is to allow it. To see past guilt and stop blaming oneself. But I have found this to be true ...
It's OK to be happy.
Love
Hanne
I am happy to see you are hanging in there.
Hanne, it was so wonderful to hear from you again. And I look forward to having happy be with me more often. Now... it's still sporadic. But you're right... stopping the blame has been the hardest part for me too.
Marty, I'm trying. The days go from good to bad and back again, far too quickly. But at least they keep going back to good eventually. :)
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